Greed SUCKS!

If the following suck doesn't make you wanna throw up, you don't deserve to breath air. A few days ago, the wonderful people at Bay City Utilities in Michigan sent out one of their people to hang a paper sign on the door knob of a resident's house to inform him that they are restricting his intake of power to heat his home until he paid his past due utility bill. Well, the fucker should pay his bill you say. I also concur, under normal circumstances. But, being that this was in Michigan, and in January, and the country is in the shit tank, you may think they would take this into consideration. Oh, and by the way....the man who was served is 93 years old and a WWII veteran. Just once more...93 FUCKING YEARS OLD.

But fuck him, the God Damn corporation needs their $1,013 from him so someone can buy their illegitimate rat bastard kid a new PlayStation game or their mistress another couple of rocks to keep her big fucking mouth shut so she won't go blabbing to the fat ugly fucking wife that he's been sticking his limp Viagra injected peen in her disease crusted baby hole. Yeah, I can understand that. Happens everyday. So they did what any good American business would do. Yup! Shut him off. So, in January, they turned the heat off on the house of an American WWII veteran who is 93 years old. Oh, and it just so happens, he died INSIDE his house of hypothermia 2 days later. Yeah, I know. What a pussy. Fucking loser.

So of course the poor over worked and over corrupt cops are bothered at Dunkins to come out and investigate. After no answer at the door, they force their way in only to find this 93 year old man frozen to death INSIDE his house. During the investigation on site, the ever so clever police "discovered" on the gentleman's kitchen table was an over due notice from the utility company, with over a thousand dollars in CASH paper clipped to the bill which he intended to pay the same day he froze. Jesus...this fucker couldn't have made it down to the bus stop and come downtown in sub zero temps to give them their money they so rightfully deserve?!? You know the utility company is fucking PISSED that they are probably going to have to go to court and sue his frozen corpse to try and get that thousand bucks. Oh, and they will. Trust me.

Isn't Amercia just the bestest place in the whole widest world?!?! A place where persistence, fortitude, strength, the need for survival, service and the right to prevail is still alive and well and a model for all that follow?

Um, I am talking about the Utility Company and not the 93 year old WWII vet.....right?!?!

I forget.

UPDATE* The frozen vet left his entire savings to a local hospital. Now go get that from them Utility Company. Fuckers. Take note of a TRUE Amercian you greedy fuking McFucktards!

http://www.cnn.com/2009/US/02/04/freezing.death.folo/index.html

full story below
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/28858971/

Award Shows SUCK!

If you are under the age of 3o years old, this will probably not make any fucking sense to you. Because your brain has been inundated with so much putrid garbage and mind numbing "entertainment" and "talent" that you are unable to fully function on your brains own power without the aid of an iPod hooked up to your own My Space page while you are on your iPhone texting your BFF's to check out your face book page that you just updated but are putting them on hold because your getting a text message of your other BFF's pic of her flashing her tits at yet another party that's "off the hook". Oh, and if this does fit you, just let me add, nice back tatt! It's SO original.

Now, I honestly haven't watched more than 5 minutes of any award show in probably the last 10 years, because, well.....let's face it, they're all just boring as hell with 90% of the same fucking fucky McFucktards that are there every shitty fucking year. They do their best acting job acting like they like each other and it's just so fucking laughable at how God Damn stupid these cum lappers are. They take themselves so fucking serious it makes you want to vomit in your dogs mouth while you french kiss them. Yeah, like I'm the only one it's ever happened to. Right!

It's just amazing how transparent these people are, but yet every year, true to American form, millions of brain dead screen droolers will turn in for 6 hours to watch these flesh puppets try to say anything in the least bit interesting and struggle to do so without a script or teleprompter in front of thier dumb fucking asses. And here's the killer, they actually think people give a shit what they say. Well some do. (please refer to paragraph #1)

When I was younger, award shows were truly something to behold. They really were. And I'll tell you why. Because unlike today, back then movie 'stars' weren't constantly on the cover of a 100 rags in the checkout line and on a wadzillion different websites every fucking day! We knew very little about our movie stars, thier personal lives, their beliefs, and THAT'S THE WAY WE LIKED IT! For fuck sakes, they're just fucking actors people! Today, every fucking tard that had a line in a film thinks they have the right to spew thier shit like people care. Um...WE DON'T. Just do the film and go the fuck away. I'm sorry, but stars were different then. Leading men were just that...MEN. Today, they're fucking PUSSY'S. Look up at how many stars enlisted in WWII. Oh, how about Jimmy Stewart, Glenn Ford, Eddie Albert, Raymond Burr, Lee Marvin, Clark Gable, Charleton Heston, Charles Bronson just to name a few. Um, how many "stars" enlisted to join the Iraq war? If you can think of just ONE, let me know.

Another thing that drives me fucking nuts, is that these monkey balls get together every other week to give themselves an award for putting out like 5 half ass movies all year long out of 1000. So basically, 0.015% of their work is worth watching, and this of course deserves to spend millions of dollars on award shows to pat each other on the back and tell each other what a great job they are all doing. Yeah, it's just like real life! Everytime I make a copy on the Savin 5830 scanner without getting my penis in the picture for that upcoming report for the boss , I get a statue, a check, and a day off from work. Man, am I good or what!

"Award" Shows SUCK!

Color SUCKS!

Please watch this clip before reading any further if you haven't already seen it somewhere else. Go ahead, I'll wait. Done? Good. Thoughts? Yeah....me too. I honestly don't even know where in the fuck to begin on bashing these two fucking idiot racist pigs. So, just to be clear, they called The President a nigger. Yup, they called him a nigger. Nice. Yeah, because you know the only people who plays the race card are white folk. This fucking irks me beyond control. And what is even more unbelievable are the fucking idiot, mindless cattle in the crowd cheering to what this fuck stick said! Oh, he's on stage and he's black, so he must be down and cool and he's keeping it real. Me shoving that microphone up his ignorant untalented ass while I take a massive shit so huge in his mouth he'll never spew moronic racist crap again is real.

Let's all remember this clip in 4 or 8 years when Obama is down the river. When a white prez comes back, I'm assuming it's okay for me to hop on a mic and scream that my honkey is back. And I'm proud of the one's who threatened Obama or tried to hurt him while in office. Oh no, can't say that now can I! ?! No, no no. That would be .....well....racist! Un-huh.

But, the biggest thing that REALLY pisses me off is the fucking lack of media attention this is getting. They should be hanging these fucktoids from the God Damn rafters. Having cd burning parties of their shitty fucking music. Boycotting anything they put their stupid made up fucking names on or are attached to. People should be throwing shoes at these uneducated untalented racist fucking puke posers every fucking chance they can get.

Way to go Shawn Carter. (that's 'Jay Z's real name. Nice. Fucking typical). Oh, and nice fucking BUG EYES you fucking ugly mother fucking toad two faced piece of shit!
Way to go Lil' Weeney, or cheesy, or faggy or rappy or whatever the fuck your stupid fucking made up fucking uneducated typical thug ass name is. You just set 'your people' back pre-MLK in years you dumb fucking idiot.

JAY Z SUCKS THE "MANS" COCK! So does his little monkey Lil' whatever his fuck.

Fucking racist assholes.

Color SUCKS!

News Media SUCKS!

We all know the news media fucking sucks, but they have out done their ass kissery recently. The news anchors tongues are just ass darts to suck up to whomever they are interviewing. I'm a self confessed "news junkie", but it's gotten to the point where I can't stand watching network news. I now get daily news info from the Cartoon Network. It's more informative and not as funny.

Balack Oslammy-Apparently we have a new president getting sworn in or something. Yeah, I was shocked when I heard it as well. His name escapes me at the moment, but if I lift up my eyes from my computer screen, perhaps it will come to me. Ah, there it is. My dog just walked by with a banner of his name on his side. Bad dog, go to the bathroom. So get this, NBC and the other loser stations are...get this...doing 15 FUCKING HOURS of coverage on the inauguration. Fifteen hours. Holy Shit! Do they have to do it in English and then again in Ebonics? What could they possible talk about for 15 fucking hours? If you watch, let me know. On second thought, don't cuz I don't give a monkey's ass. Tuesday is new video release day, and I'm getting the entire 2nd season of "Saved by the Bell" on DVD.

Now, before you get your panties all bunched up on the left side of your ass, yeah I get it. New prez, he's gonna piss gold, walk on water, save the world, historical moment, blah blah blah. Another historical moment was when I discovered Mr. Meat Bat was made for more than peeing but I don't shove it down your throat for 15 hours. Wait....scratch that. I guess I'll be super bummed out for missing the inauguration when I wake up on Wednesday morning and the world is at peace and everyone is rich and I'll have to get used to seeing that permanent rainbow in the sky. Un-huh.

Hero...NOT- Bird attacks plane, bird wins. So Sam Drucker from Green Acres here sucked up a flock of birds in his engine in New York. Ohhh boy! Wait til' PETA hears about that one. Boooyyyy you in trouuubbble! So I'm watching this shit live, and I told my girlfriend, watch, they'll call him a hero. Sure as shit, 2 hours later, hero is splashed over the screen. Hero. Really? He crashed an airplane and he's a hero? Hmmm. Pilot crashes = hero. So me speeding ticket=NASCAR Race driver. Oh, makes sense. So Sam crash lands the plane in the Hudson river and everyone gets off the plane. Um, end of story? No I say. Why? Becuase damn it! He's a fucking hero! Really, a hero? Lets reflect shall we? Lets.

So this guy is a pilot. What's his job you might ask? To fly a fucking plane, and to TRAIN on scenarios when shit doesn't go right. AND he trained others on what to do in these emergencies. AND he was also on the safety board for training for this shit. AND...it hit a bird! This shit happens ALOT. AND...he gets paid a LOT of money for this shit. When a plane crashes, usually people die. But when one lands and people walk, he's a hero. Give me a fucking break! THIS IS YOUR FUCKING JOB! It's what you get paid a TON of money for! Obviously I am glad nobody died and nobody on the ground was killed or injured. I think he did a great JOB. There's that word again. But the heroes I know of are in some shitty unmarked hole in the ground in France, or in Korea, Vietnam, Iraq. Those people did a JOB that they knew they were probably going to get killed. But the fucking news media won't do a story on Billy Nobody from Fuckstick, Idaho. He didn't get paid a lot, he didn't 'expect' to come back everyday. He had people he was responsible for too. But he was being shot at, with real live bullets. Not dodging fucking birds. He went without food, without sleep. He was cold and wet, he was hot and dry. He didn't have his wife and kids on the news smiling for the cameras. He never had a wife, he never had children. Because he never came home. Because he did a shitty thankless job that nobody wanted to and was killed so others could climb aboard some plane and go on vacation and suck up a bird and get saved be a real 'hero'.

REMEMBER THIS PEOPLE-We never get to thank Heroes.

News Media SUCKS!

Television SUCKS (part 1)

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Ryan Seacrest SUCKS!

God I hate this faggot. No, I don't hate fags or lesbos or transgender or whatever the fuck they're called, I really don't. So ease up on the fucking hate mail there pole smoke. I just hate this one. So we were watching American Idol and this sperm vaccum tries to high five a blind contestant! Jesus this twink is a fucking idiot. I guess he was too busy staring at the other dudes ass or trying to get the phone number off a 16 year old boy to rape later to actually pay the fuck attention. That's what your paid for Ryanus! How fucking hard is that? Seriously cock breath.

His doucheduggery was apparent just a few nights ago when he was trying to get Brad and Angelina over for an interview and they totally snubbed his ass. Ryanus was right next to them and they didn't even acknowledge his shit stained dickness. HA! Yeah, let's get somebody to do interviews on the red carpet that NOBODY can stand. Good call you fucktards.

So this opened up the discussion over whether he's a faggot or not. Well, he has said he's not. Oh, okay, well.....if Ryanus said he isn't, I guess he's not. Un-huh. Sure, he's had his pic taken with a few girls over the last couple of years. Wait! A FEW girls?!? If I was him I would be banging every fucking star struck whore I could until my wang rotted off. Then I would go get a wooden cock added to me (Like George Washington did), and fuck the rest of the skanks I missed the first time around. Did you see him with the "Bikini Skank" on Idol? Just a TAD uncomfortable Ryanus? That looked like me getting ready to make out with my dad.

What's truly sad, is that this is the fucking best Hollywood can do! Just fucking hit me in the face with a wooden dildo with nails driven into it. Because that's what if feels like everytime I'm forced to see this prick. And shut the fuck up Carson Daily, you are just equally shitty and faggy as Ryanus. Yeah, these pricks are what we get to look forward to for the next several decades as 'hosts and presenters". Unless.....Carson and Ryanus hook up, and get stuck like dogs, and then fall off their balcony while trying to get unstuck! Fuck you....I can dream fucker.

Ryanus Seacrust SUCKS!

OPRAH SUCKS!

So, Ocow is on the tube today and telling everyone why she is fat. Again. What could have cuased it this time Opie? Stedman not forcing the burnt beef curtains enough? It can't be your BFF Gayle. Nobody has seen her lately, so let's assume she is still safely up in your ass. Hmmm...this is perplexing.

She is saying that it's caused from, now get this, you'll love it....it's because her 'life is out of balance". Really. Your life is out of balance. Wow, poor fucking thing. Try having your god damn CHECK BOOK out of balance and see if THAT helps you fucking stop shoving live piggies down your throat. Give me a fucking break. And NOW, she is ALSO saying it's her Thyroid. Un-huh. Life out of balance, thyroid, and NOW she added depression. Yup. Can't be due to the fact that you've been a fucking cow your entire life. Nahhhhh......that's not it.

She is SO fucking full of shit. Now, I know other people have issues, but fuck them, I'm talking about Oprah. Look, she isn't that much older than me. My waist size is the same size since I was discharged from the Marine Corps. Over 25 fucking years ago! BTW, it's 34. It's not what your "blame of the day" you stupid rich fat cow...it's your fucking life style. Simple. You lost it a hundred times before, you just cant keep it the fuck off. So, now you'll do ANOTHER fucking 30 stories on it.

Does she think just becuase she's extremely rich and famous, she knows what the fuck she's talking about?!? You obviously don't know what the fuck you're talking about when it comes to losing weight fatty mcFatass! So STFU and stick to subjects you know! Like kissing celebrities asses and trying to give shit away to a room full of OAK's. (OAK's = Oprah Asshole Kissers).

Oprah SUCKS! Usually everything right off the fucking plate.